


He Holds Back (Sometimes He Won't)

by nhasablog



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Getting Together, M/M, Tickling, feet tickling, nothing smutty whatsoever, tickle kink, ticklish tony stark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-27
Updated: 2019-08-27
Packaged: 2020-09-28 02:11:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20418182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nhasablog/pseuds/nhasablog
Summary: “Only if you tell me why you indulge me,” Tony countered. “What’s in it for you?”Bucky straightened. “I- I like making you happy.”“You can make me happy in other ways.”“I wanna make you happy in this one.”(Or, Bucky witnesses Rhodey tickling Tony, only Tony doesn't move away from it and Bucky can't stop thinking about it.)





	He Holds Back (Sometimes He Won't)

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy the fic! It's very tame, with some foot tickling and Tony liking being tickled. For some reason I listened to God's Plan by Drake (???) during the entire writing process, so the title is a modified line from the song lmao.

Bucky noticed it before they were properly friends; a private moment he hadn’t been supposed to witness. And, due to the circumstances around it, he couldn’t bring it up. Would look like a stalking-prone lunatic to Tony if he did.

Tony and Rhodes had been in the kitchen, sharing one last breakfast before the colonel was supposed to leave the state, maybe country, for an unknown amount of time. Bucky had stopped in his tracks, mere steps away from being in their line of sight. Intruding, as usual. He’d been one situation away from demanding S.H.I.E.L.D. give him his own apartment or something when he’d seen it. The moment that would play around in his mind for months.

Rhodes had leaned closer, his hands not visible from where Bucky had been standing. He’d swallowed back a horrified gasp before realizing they weren’t getting dirty in the kitchen area. Stark’s giggle wasn’t one he’d associate with sexual activities.

But then again, who was he to know?

Taking a step back, Bucky had tried to force himself to avert his gaze and leave them be, but the way Tony had been laughing had been too intriguing. Mesmerizing, even. He’d wanted to know so badly what Rhodes had been doing to bring that sound into the world.

So he’d stayed. Like a stalking-prone, intruding lunatic. Only for a minute, since whatever the hell they’d been doing hadn’t lasted longer, but he’d caught a glimpse of Rhodes’ hands when Tony had doubled over, and had realized he’d been tickling him all along. Tony hadn’t even tried to stop him.

Bucky couldn’t let that moment go.

Tony became visibly low over Rhodes’ absence during the weeks that followed. Bucky couldn’t deny he’d been watching him, wondering what that moment had meant and if it was a frequent activity they partook in. It was none of his business, but… well, Stark fascinated him, mostly because he was constantly surprising him. Unlike his father there seemed to be an actual human being beneath that facade.

“Oh, sorry.”

Bucky looked up from the newspaper he’d been reading, catching Tony’s eye just as the latter made a move to exit the kitchen again. “No, no, come in.”

“I don’t want to bother you. I didn’t think anyone else was up yet.”

It was barely 5AM, the October morning gloomy and rainy. “I couldn’t sleep,” Bucky said, pushing his paper to the side.

Tony blinked, took three steps and sat down across from him. “Neither could I.”

“You reckon there’s a full moon?”

“You really believe in that crap?”

“We’re friends with a _God_. There’s nothing I don’t believe in anymore.”

Tony huffed out a laugh. “Fair enough.”

That laugh reminded him of… well then again, he didn’t need a reason to remember the moment he’d witnessed. He was almost always thinking of it. An obsession, is what it was.

He cleared his throat and reached for his paper again, scanning the article he’d been reading. “Sam makes fun of me for not just reading the news on my phone.”

“I can’t blame you. It must be overwhelming.”

“It is. But it’s also fucking amazing.”

“Oh?” Tony leaned forward, head tilted. “Go on.”

“I was a bit of a tech nerd back in my time. To see all of _this_\- People using everything as an everyday thing-” Bucky shook his head. “I can’t explain it.”

“It sounds like you deserve a private tour of my lab.” Tony stood, his face not as sunken as before. “Come on.”

“Now?”

“No time like the present.”

So they started becoming friends. Sort of. After Bucky had finished geeking out over all of the things he’d “_made_! you actually made all this!” it was as if the ice had started melting. Not breaking, but simply becoming less of a barrier, slowly but steadily.

He still couldn’t let that moment go, though. It was becoming a problem.

His interactions with Tony were always surface leveled. Unsaid things at the tip of their tongues, but Bucky couldn’t interpret what it all meant. An apology that had been made months ago was finally starting to result in forgiveness. A realization, coming to terms with their complicated history. Bucky refused to put it all into words lest he’d come up short. There was no name for them. For what was growing, becoming, slowly slowly unraveling during late nights in the kitchen, afternoons in the lab. Bucky all the while wondering where else Tony was ticklish. If he found such a comfort in it that he’d endure it if it came from Rhodey. If he’d be okay with Bucky trying his hand at it.

Growing up, he’d playfully tortured Steve due to his advantage in size. Due to Steve usually being so tough and coming completely apart by a few pokes. Steve had retaliated once he’d become Captain America, but tickling had still just remained something fleeting in his life. Something he rarely thought of.

He looked at Tony; watched him eat or build or talk or laugh, and wondered. If he curled his fingers ever so slightly while grabbing his elbow, would he laugh? Would he keep his distance forever if Bucky decided to brush his knuckles over his sides while reaching over him to grab the remote? Would he, as opposed to with Rhodes, refuse to let him touch him again?

“You seem tired.”

Tony looked up from his pad, head propped up by two pillows. “I have to admit I’m falling asleep.”

“So sleep,” Bucky said, hovering by the foot of the couch. He wouldn’t fit between the armrest and Tony’s feet.

“I can’t. I’m working.”

“It seems like a cozy working space.”

“It doesn’t help my exhaustion. Trust me.” He withdrew his feet, indicating for him to sit, which he did. “But I’m too lazy to move, so.”

Bucky grinned. “Never thought I’d hear you call yourself lazy when you’re anything but.”

“I have my moments.”

“As we all do.” He paused, eyed Tony’s curled up legs. It was too early to tell him he could rest them on his lap, but the fact that he didn’t sit up to make the situation more formal was something. “What are you working on?”

“Just some new designs. Once everyone realized that I was more than willing to redesign their suits and weapons they haven’t left me alone.”

“Sorry.”

“S’all right. I’d rather no one died on my watch.”

“It’s not your responsibility.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it.”

“Tony.” Bucky grabbed his shin for reasons he couldn’t comprehend. “You’re not immortal. You need to rest, too.”

Tony was looking at his hand, but was making no move to pull away from the touch. “I rest.”

“Not enough. When was the last time you got a full night’s sleep?”

“It’s not my fault I have insomniatic tendencies.”

“Tony.”

“Fine.” He put his pad down and pulled himself upright, slowly withdrawing his leg so that Bucky’s hand was suddenly on his ankle. For some reason still holding onto him. “You win.”

“That’s a first.”

“Don’t get used to it.”

Bucky laughed and gave his ankle a squeeze before letting go. If it tickled him, Tony didn’t make it known.

* * *

Bucky watched him interact with the other Avengers and wondered. Wondered if the playful punch from Thor tickled him. Wondered if Bruce’s hug tickled him. If any of them had accidentally or purposefully tickled him and how he’d reacted. Had he wanted them to continue? Had they seen Rhodes reach over and curl his fingers over Tony’s side or had that been reserved for only Bucky’s intrusive eyes?

He looked at him and thought: _He’s ticklish. He’s really really ticklish._

“You keep watching him.”

“What?”

“Tony. You keep watching him.”

Bucky turned to Sam, snarky reply dying in his mouth when he caught sight of his raised eyebrows. Caught red handed, deer in headlights etc. “Shut up.”

Sam snorted, his smirk definitely _not_ making Bucky want to blush thank you very much. “You’re not subtle, Barnes.”

“If you weren’t so obsessed with me you wouldn’t have noticed.”

“Bullshit. It’s visible from Asgard.”

“I’m just watching. That’s not a crime.”

“Never said it was. You’re the one getting defensive.”

“Your tone gives me no choice.”

“Nah, I think you’re just overthinking this.” Sam gave his back a pat. “But your reaction has made me certain you’re harboring, if not a crush, at least a fascination with the man.”

“You’re never gonna let me live this down, are you.”

“Never.”

Bucky deflated. “He _does_ fascinate me. I guess I’m just trying to figure him out.”

“You seem to be letting him in quickly.”

“So?”

“Meaning he’s probably doing the same to you, but in his own pace. I didn’t think I’d see you guys share meals on your own.”

“I don’t really think we did either.”

“So what changed?”

“I saw something.”

“Saw what?”

Bucky pushed the hair out of his face. “His humanity.”

“That’s cheesy.”

“The truth often is.”

“Stop dropping deep quotes and ask him out already.”

Bucky turned to Sam, spluttering. “I’m not gonna ask him out.”

“Why not?”

“I’m not in love with him.”

“Yet.”

“Sam.”

“Come on.” Sam play punched him in the belly. “Don’t think I haven’t seen the way you light up when you see him. Humanity my ass. You wanna pound him like a-”

“All right, enough.” Bucky, his mind always stuck on that moment, started tickling Sam automatically; fingertips digging into the defined muscles on his midriff. Only Sam didn’t laugh.

He did call out, indicating that it probably did tickle a bit, but his retaliation came quicker than Bucky had expected, and by the time Tony entered the room he was giggling like a fool as Sam’s fingers danced over his ribs. They probably looked silly as hell, and Bucky was grateful for the fact that his face was already warm.

“Am I interrupting something?” Tony asked, and maybe Bucky was overthinking it but he could hear something in his voice. Something strained and unidentifiable. “Shouldn’t you be able to fight him off super easily?”

“I think I’ve found this super soldier’s kryptonite,” Sam said, backing off only because Bucky’s grip around his wrist tightened. “That was fun. You should try it.”

“I’m good,” Tony deadpanned. “Sorry for breaking this up, but Barnes, do you have a moment?”

“Give me a sec,” Bucky said, voice still laced with laughter. “I’m just gonna kill this one and I’ll be right with you.”

Tony’s laugh sounded forced, and when he turned he did so much more quicker than was natural.

Bucky’s glare did nothing to dampen Sam’s smirk once he’d recovered, so he followed Tony toward the elevator without another word, the two of them walking side by side. It wasn’t exactly awkward, but something felt off. As if Tony didn’t actually want him around, or at the very least wasn’t sure how he felt about his presence.

“When is Rhodes coming back?” he blurted, the question seemingly unprompted. “Do you know?”

Tony turned to him, frowning. “Not sure. Why?”

“He’s been gone for months. I was just wondering.”

“It’s usually like this.” 

“You must miss him.”

“We facetime a lot.”

“It’s not the same when you can’t touch.”

“That sounds wrong.”

“Am I wrong, though?”

Tony averted his gaze, pausing in front of the elevator doors.

Bucky pressed the button. “Sorry.”

“About?”

“Being too forward. Nosy. I don’t know.”

“I’m just trying to figure you out.”

Bucky laughed. “That’s what I’ve been trying to do for months.”

Tony hummed, leaning against the wall nonchalantly, only his jaw was too tense for him to be casual. “Any luck?”

“Some.”

“Good.”

“Is it?”

“Better you figure things out than me having to say them.” The doors opened and they entered, Tony clicking the button for his lab in a swift motion. “This won’t take long.”

“Bummer.”

Tony looked at him. “Is it?” he asked, mimicking him.

“Of course.”

Tony’s grin was sudden, but so very welcome. “I should tickle you in here where you can’t get away. See if Sam’s theory is true.”

“We both know I’m not the one who should be on the receiving end.”

Not even Tony Stark could hide a blush. He cleared his throat, body unnaturally rigid. “And what makes you think that?”

“A… moment I accidentally witnessed.”

“Ah.”

“I’ve been wondering about it ever since.”

“So why didn’t you ask?”

“There’s simply no way to bring that up without looking like a creep.”

Tony laughed, the sound too high pitched. “Well, I reckon the subject is strange enough for it to even out.”

“It’s not.”

“No?”

“Not to me.”

The doors opened. They were the only ones on the entire floor.

Bucky turned to face him. “I don’t have to act on it.”

“Why not?”

“If you don’t want to.”

Tony wasn’t looking at him. “And if I want you to?”

“Then we don’t have to talk about it. I can see it’s making you uncomfortable.”

“That’s an understatement.”

Bucky’s hand was on Tony’s chest, unmoving as Tony breathed. “It’s okay.”

Tony met his gaze, jaw finally relaxing. “Maybe one day I’ll talk about it.”

Bucky let his hand slide downward, pausing at his belly. “You don’t have to.”

“I want to.”

Bucky curled his fingers and their dance began.

* * *

Whatever Bucky had imagined, what they were doing was not it. They never put it into words. Bucky never asked what it meant. He simply sought Tony out, assessed his mood, and reached for whatever body part seemed appropriate and let his fingers slowly tease the skin, stopping to check if it was all right before diving back in. It didn’t always make Tony laugh. He seemed quite good at keeping his composure even as Bucky slowly made him unravel. Some days he barely smiled, but it was the occasional giggle that kept making Bucky come back. It was too rewarding.

He learned that Tony didn’t seek the loss of control that came with tickle fights. Didn’t long for the ruckus. At least not when it came to the two of them. Whatever it was about the sensation, he seemed content in only experiencing that. The fight between pulling away and staying put. He enjoyed it. Bucky did too, whatever this was.

He found Tony on the couch in his lab, pad in hand. A common sight. He didn’t greet him as he entered. Only curled up his legs. The sign Bucky needed to sit down at the foot of the couch and pull Tony’s feet onto his lap, fingertips skimming the top of them. Tony’s eyes remained glued to the screen, face as stoic as ever.

Bucky watched the wall, his nonchalance completely unnecessary but part of the game. He could see Tony typing something in the corner of his eye, and his fingers slowly moved to the soles of his feet, short nails setting to work.

He could always feel the ghost tickles on his own body whenever he did this, and he rubbed his feet against the floor, trying to imagine what this felt like for Tony. His feet twitched at the touch, but he didn’t pull away, face remaining expressionless. Bucky had learned that his toes were the most sensitive parts of his feet, and thus left them alone for now. Neither of them were ready for this to end just yet.

They didn’t talk. Bucky didn’t tease. Tony didn’t ask him to stop. They would only open their mouths when it was ending, the sensual turning playful and thus reaching its climax. Since Tony was barely reacting Bucky found nothing to tease him about anyway. He could’ve brought up the obvious fact that Tony liked this, but he usually saw no point. Tony could only handle it as long as he didn’t start feeling flustered. As much as Bucky adored his blush, his own needs could wait.

Tony was hiding behind his pad now, toes curling even though Bucky was nowhere near them yet. If he was smiling, Bucky couldn’t see it. His fingers stilled, torn between continuing and lowering the pad so that he could see. Undecided, his fingertips collided with skin accidentally, startling Tony so that he jerked away. The biggest reaction he’d ever caused this early in.

“Sorry,” he said, breaking the silence.

Tony peeked at him over the pad. He didn’t say anything, only watched Bucky’s hands as he ran them up his soles again. He’d often wondered what Tony’s reaction would be like if he suddenly switched spots entirely, but so far he’d focused on one spot for each session. Would he be breaking the rules if he tickled his knees right now? His belly, underarms, neck? Would he break the rules if they’d never established them in the first place?

He reached his toes, grabbing onto one of them and finally succeeding in making Tony squirm. Biting hit lower lip, Tony exhaled slowly and loudly, eyes finding the ceiling as if he was asking god to give him strength. Bucky adored watching the beginning of his demise, so to say. Call him sadistic, but there was something so utterly satisfying about seeing that resolve melt away.

He waited a beat, two, and then started tickling him in earnest. Between each toe on both feet. Beneath them. On them. Even on top of them. Tony had dropped the pad entirely, not even faking concentration. The ghost of a smile was on his lips. Bucky wanted so desperately to see it bloom.

“You like that, don’t you?” His tone wasn’t even playful. Just matter of fact. And yet Tony flushed, instantly defensive.

“Quiet,” he said, voice strained, lips twitching upward. So close.

“Not denying it, I see.”

“S-Stop.”

“Was that a giggle?”

It was. Tony rarely spoke during sessions because he couldn’t do so without laughing and giving himself away. And now that he had started, he couldn’t stop. It was, simply put, adorable.

Yeah, okay, maybe Sam was right.

“No, no, please, I can’t.” Tony withdrew his feet, and Bucky toyed with the idea of following, but decided to let him be. His laughter died down easily, but the smile was stuck on his face as he sat up, rubbing at his feet.

“Ah, you broke,” Bucky said, grinning.

“Shut up.” Tony’s face was pink, the lack of silence after a session leaving him visibly fumbling. “You cheated.”

“No cheating if we had no rules.”

“Still.”

“Can I see your notes?”

“What?”

“I want to see if my hands affected your concentration at all.”

Tony stared at him for a moment, still rubbing his feet. Whatever he was thinking, Bucky couldn’t interpret it. He handed the pad over without another word, and Bucky stared at the hysteria that was displayed on the screen.

_It tickles, it tickles, it tickles._ Over and over, with a few typos. A few strung together words.

Bucky looked up at him. “Is this how you cope?”

“Sometimes.” Tony seemed to be making a point of not looking away. “When I feel close to breaking.”

“What’s so bad about breaking?”

The alarm that told them that the Avengers were needed Right Now suddenly rang, and Bucky never got to hear the anwer.

* * *

“Tell me why you like it.”

They were in the library, Bucky browsing the countless titles while Tony watched from a couch, patiently waiting. Bucky didn’t know why he’d asked, but the question had been going around his head for days. The silent dance had become too much. He needed words, if only briefly.

“Please.” He turned to look at Tony. Took in his stoicness.

“Only if you tell me why you indulge me,” Tony countered. “What’s in it for you?”

Bucky straightened. “I- I like making you happy.”

“You can make me happy in other ways.”

“I wanna make you happy in this one.”

“But _why_?”

Bucky took a step closer. “Because… because I couldn’t let go of what I saw.”

“What exactly did you see?”

“You and Rhodey.”

“Ah.”

“I didn’t mean to.”

“I know.”

“You seemed so at peace. I wanted to make you feel like that.”

Tony rubbed his eyes. “I don’t know why I like it, to answer your question. Rhodey’s just… He figured it out years ago, back in college. Been doing it to me occasionally ever since. Whenever he thinks I need it.”

“I never meant to take his place.”

“No, no, it’s fine. He’d be happy if he knew I had someone take care of me while he’s away. And besides.” Tony’s smile was shy. Bucky wanted to kiss him so badly. “You seem to have a fascination for it, too. Doing it to me, I mean. Rhodey does it for me, but it seems to be making you happy as well.”

Bucky let out a laugh. “Maybe. I don’t know. I like doing it.”

“That’s why I let you. And because I’ve somehow grown comfortable around you.”

“Didn’t see that coming, huh.”

“Never in a million years.” Tony stood and pulled a book out of the shelf. “You should read this one.”

“I sort of want to do something else right now.”

“Oh? Do tell.”

“Well, firstly I want to tickle you to pieces.” He took a step closer, smiling when Tony’s face grew pink. “I want to actually make you laugh.” Another step. “And then I want to kiss you. If you’d led me.”

Tony cleared his throat. “I can’t promise I won’t thrash like crazy if you’re gonna tickle me so badly that I laugh.”

“I’m all right with that.”

“And I can’t promise I won’t kiss you back.”

“I don’t want that type of promise anyway.” Another step. Tony just in reach. “You ready to laugh, Stark?”

His smile was giddy. “Always.”

“Don’t hold back, please.”

“I won’t.” And he didn’t.


End file.
